Becoming the Butterfly

I am going to tell you about my secret adventure.  A program being developed by my friend, April Adams.  I am also seeing many other persons begin to offer the same “type” of program.  Us “messengers” begin to get these similar messages at the same time, but we sometimes perceive them quite differently.  This is because we don’t all need the same thing.  However, this program is different?  Why?

Because my family and I have had the most horrifying things happen in our lives recently.  I have nearly lost 4 of the closest people to my heart in very significant and painful ways. How close to the heart is this??  This is my family, my children, my wife, my granddaughter, and when I say lost…I mean lost to me forever on this plane of existence.

I once talked about how I perhaps was meant to hold space for energy, to meditate all day every day on raising our vibration and just being a channel for information.  I didn’t know if I would be able to commit myself to a life that didn’t involve being in “life”.

What I am seeing lately, is that our worst fears are coming up NOW!  To have us face them. To heal and cleanse them.  Let me tell you, in no way did I think that it would be presented to me in this way.  I have been struggling the last couple of months to do what it is I believe I need to, but I have not been able to use any personal energy to help myself.

To heal and love myself, even when I am at the lowest possible point in my life….losing those I love is the worst thing that I could imagine happening, and I still feel like I am on a teeter-totter of pain, ready to fall off into the abyss at any moment. One more small weight of a feather.

This is where April Adams has stepped in.  She has created a program that has immediately been able to help me become the person I want to be.  Not need to be, or forced to be, or became because someone’s ideas where forced upon me.  But, in my own words, just spoken in her beautiful voice. Using this program, I can FEEL the difference in myself in just the last four days that I have been using it.

The first time I used the meditation program (this is not just a meditation program…believe me and this is not a sales pitch, as it is not available to the public yet….), I was able to observe its effects on my mind and body.  This is because I have been training myself for sometime achieving a certain state of mind.  This program trumps that ten fold.

I am sharing my incredible experiences here because this is what I do.  I share.  I speak. I put myself out there.

I may seem preachy sometimes, in fact, I know I do.  I also have a lot of dark pain to show you so that  you realize that you can fight whatever there is ahead of you with certain tools and support systems.  Trust me…April and I have been working together for this very moment for sometime now.  Having channeled information for the shift as well as the changes that will take place during this time.

I cannot stress enough to you that you MUST reach out to those around you now in this time.  Community is essential and the caregivers are ready to receive you.  I am working hard at being MYSELF these days, or I WILL be lost into that abyss.  I know now, the games have begun.

With this program today, I listened and at first I could not relax as my muscles (from my physical challenge) were spasming badly this morning.  I was just about to think….I will have to start this listening session over again and the next thing I know…bam!  I was on my way to the programing session….spoken in my own words, with April’s voice I was comfortably lulled into positive expression of self.  I felt the words stop but I was completely relaxed, and in the in between state of wake and sleep.  I listened to the silence that was after my program and felt at peace.  No worry, no fear.  Restful and pleasantly sleepy.  I napped afterward and had vivid dreams.  It was the best rest that I have gotten in the last month or more.  When I got up, I felt GOOD!  Better than good, great…I walked my dogs and took them on a long walk….feeling the weather and enjoying it.  I then came back and wrote this.

I am excited for the rest of this day, for this turning point for myself, and I encourage all of you….gather your tools, your friends, your community, and prepare yourself for your own emergence.

The butterfly escapes!

Free me….

“Free me, free me, free me from this world…”

I am here to announce as of Saturday, May 25, 2013 at 3:12 pm EST, the slate has been wiped clean!! What does that mean?? Good question!! I can only tell you that our interpretation (myself and two others present yesterday at a portal opening), is that we are free to build the life we seek. In fact, not only are we free…we are responsible to do so. First, let’s go over a few things….

Building a life of our dreams is completely and totally possible at this time….whatever you want can be built!!

However, there is a catch…always is…we are not building for ourselves….we are building for EVERYONE!! This is the responsibility clause…build it! Build it, but build it with the world in mind, as whatever it is you are building will be what is created in this world NOW!! Be mindful of your thoughts and actions more so now, than ever before. The way is open, but building only for yourself will NOT work!! That is to say….building for just YOURSELF in the fashion of only securing abundance or finances or anything for you and YOU ONLY…will not work. In fact, I believe that not seeing ourselves now as a whole…(not just individuals in a world of many individuals, but to recognize ourselves as truthfully connected to all life…and everything here is life)…will be a huge blow back for the persons who cannot put their best foot forward for the sake of the ALL, the ONE, the Collective. It will not be allowed!

So, lets recap, plain and simple. Take care of yourself first….

Wait a minute…didn’t I just say build for others? Yes! Build YOUR hopes and dreams and fantasies of abundant life, whatever that means to you….for EVERYONE!! In order to do so, you must take care of yourself first. By honoring yourself in a way that most people do not do anymore: plenty of rest, plenty of clean, filtered water (not soda, coffee, sugary juices, frothy beverages…save these for a treat once in awhile), nutrition….(my biggest struggle), quiet and mindful space holding….meditation, reiki, tai chi, nature walks…, a holistic approach to work, family, responsibilities…realize you must be a whole person to build to begin with. It is okay to be a “work in progress”, but BE the work in progress!

We have work to do, my friends! Have you ever wanted a do-over? Have you ever thought…if only I knew then…what I know now…well, that’s okay. Here is your chance!! What do YOU think we should build? What do you think this world should look like….remember you are building for everyone. So, what does the world need? Think deeply, think often and think softly.


“Grace, is by means, much more powerful than aggression. Be brave enough to face yourself and your beliefs, your enabling of others to keep their heads in the sand. YOU hold the keys to your desires, it is in your heart and in your hands. It is YOU that holds the life in your hands, creator! The infinite life, a cause for greatness, implementing the design and the will and action of ALL.”

Bring it!

Can Anybody Find Me… Somebody toooooo…..

Ladies and Gentlemen, please stand for the talented, the gifted, the magnificent Freddie Mercury

There is always something to be said for the person who stays up late to write themselves a love note….who does that??

Well, I’m doing it, and why not, don’t I deserve it?  The time on my blog here is incorrect and I cannot for the life of me figure out how to change it to Eastern time.  Now that I have acknowledged it, I’m okay with it.  That is how most things happen these days, you recognize an issue, identify it to others, and upon said identification, the issue is resolved.  Really?….really!!  Truthfully, what took us weeks or months, or even years to identify within ourselves has become almost instantaneous.

What I can tell you, is if you are not paying attention you can create blockages in the same manner.  It is seriously not a time to be screwing around out there.  We are the creators of our destiny in every sense of the phrase…what we do, what we say, what we think…becomes our reality.  Honestly, this has always been so, it just took us more time to create it.

If you have not already noticed some changes, you will have no reason to deny these changes by mid-March.  The changes I speak of are happening everywhere around the world.  People fear change because it is unknown.  I choose to embrace these changes.  Since I have embraced change, I have only scratched the surface of who it is I am.  We will have challenges to overcome, this I know for sure.  The changes we will undergo will stress our need for community.  That is why community is now an idea that is being embraced just as easily as some are embracing these changes. You will soon come face to face with this for yourself.

If there is someone you should be kind to, someone you need to shine a little bit o’ light onto right now….that’s YOU!  Now, I know that I said this blog would be real.  It would focus on the dark and the light, don’t worry, I’m not about to let you down.  I also have nothing to say here that should scare anyone.

WE are not lost, but you will find that things will look darker before the light shines again.  This is not to say that there will not be a helping hand every step of the way.  When you come to a better understanding of how this process works, you may realize that some of this change can be somewhat difficult . Especially if you are not prepared for it.  I had no idea what was happening to me, and every day was not the energetic waltz.  It was more like tripping over your own shoelaces during a line dance, and causing a domino effect among all the other dancers. Stay strong, my lovlies!

Nothing is about to go smoothly, so when I say it is time to write yourself a love note, take my advice.  The best way through this is with all the self-love you can muster.  If you want energetic connection, you have to get rid of the life time of (maybe sometimes well intended) sometimes traumatic messages we have heard over our lives.  The messages that once were spoken to us, and then heralded by ourselves up to the heavens.  No job?  You’re lazy.  Overweight?  You’re a glutton.  Covered in mud?  You’re dirty.  Hey, I was gardening!!!!  Yeah, that’s right!!  With organic compost!  Is there another kind?

Anyone can tell you anything, and when we are young we listen.  Now, we are adults.  We have a choice.  Do you want to play that tape over and over and over again?  Good.  You don’t have to.  If you were interested in playing that tape just one last time….you would be playing it, and not reading this.  We all know that that one last time is always at the end of the bottle, not the beginning, on the last slice of cake, not the first, on the crumbled up pack, and not the first smoke, on the last score, or the last high, the last bet, the last drink, the last binge, the last bit of hell we can put ourselves through…until, we’ve had enough.

I had enough.  I had enough smokes, drinks, icecream tubs, sex, anger, depression, heartache, hate, pain, blame….I’ve tried a lot of ways to ignore my feelings, and I still work on it.  My body, my mind, my emotional, spiritual, mental, physical, energetic self needs LOVE.  I will take it above anything else. Without it, I am just a pile of bad decisions, mistakes, last chances, and lonely nights.

Now, here is the difference between what I propose and what you call being “saved”.  YOU DO NOT HAVE TO TRADE ONE ADDICTION FOR ANOTHER!!  Most of what we do, is trade one thing to obsess about for another thing to obsess about.  Here is how to tell if you are doing that:

Does it make you happy?  Truly happy, like you want to dance happy…all the time happy!!

Does it set you free? Like I can do whatever I want free, and I choose to do such awesome, loving acts of kindness to bestow upon myself free. 

Because I love myself.  Yeah, you heard me.  I don’t have a problem with it.  Do you?

This is how much:

Dear Laura,

I know that you have spent a lot of time thinking about all the trials that you have encountered over the years, and that you can appreciate each for its significant experience in your life.  I am so glad that you have chosen to release all pain and fear around these small incidences in your life.  You have so many years ahead to live a healthy, vibrant life, and I am so happy that you finally know just how much you deserve this.  Thank you for recognizing this at the most important time in your life.  You are very smart, and I am so glad to have you leading me, and making such good choices.  I admire your ability to face your fears openly and for learning all that you have from doing so.  Thank you for deciding that you are worth financial freedom, and the ability to treat your body with love and nutrition.  I know you are taking on as much as you can do for yourself right now, and you will definitely reach all your goals in time.  You are very patient and believe in yourself.  I don’t know anyone more honest, caring and loving than you.  You take care of yourself above all others, because you know that if you do not, you will not be able to take care of anyone else.  Because you are generous by nature Source has gifted you with abilities that you can share with others. It is this that makes you want others to empower themselves, and you are only better for that.  You receive every comfort in life, because you are ready to except this.  I am proud of you, and I love you!!!!

I could go on for days!!  I would be embarrassed to write this at any other time in my life, but I am releasing those old ways, as many times as I have to.  I am doing this because I am learning to love myself, and honor myself, and I will NEVER go back!!

Can anybody find mmeeeeee…somebody tooooo……..LOVE!