Becoming the Butterfly

I am going to tell you about my secret adventure.  A program being developed by my friend, April Adams.  I am also seeing many other persons begin to offer the same “type” of program.  Us “messengers” begin to get these similar messages at the same time, but we sometimes perceive them quite differently.  This is because we don’t all need the same thing.  However, this program is different?  Why?

Because my family and I have had the most horrifying things happen in our lives recently.  I have nearly lost 4 of the closest people to my heart in very significant and painful ways. How close to the heart is this??  This is my family, my children, my wife, my granddaughter, and when I say lost…I mean lost to me forever on this plane of existence.

I once talked about how I perhaps was meant to hold space for energy, to meditate all day every day on raising our vibration and just being a channel for information.  I didn’t know if I would be able to commit myself to a life that didn’t involve being in “life”.

What I am seeing lately, is that our worst fears are coming up NOW!  To have us face them. To heal and cleanse them.  Let me tell you, in no way did I think that it would be presented to me in this way.  I have been struggling the last couple of months to do what it is I believe I need to, but I have not been able to use any personal energy to help myself.

To heal and love myself, even when I am at the lowest possible point in my life….losing those I love is the worst thing that I could imagine happening, and I still feel like I am on a teeter-totter of pain, ready to fall off into the abyss at any moment. One more small weight of a feather.

This is where April Adams has stepped in.  She has created a program that has immediately been able to help me become the person I want to be.  Not need to be, or forced to be, or became because someone’s ideas where forced upon me.  But, in my own words, just spoken in her beautiful voice. Using this program, I can FEEL the difference in myself in just the last four days that I have been using it.

The first time I used the meditation program (this is not just a meditation program…believe me and this is not a sales pitch, as it is not available to the public yet….), I was able to observe its effects on my mind and body.  This is because I have been training myself for sometime achieving a certain state of mind.  This program trumps that ten fold.

I am sharing my incredible experiences here because this is what I do.  I share.  I speak. I put myself out there.

I may seem preachy sometimes, in fact, I know I do.  I also have a lot of dark pain to show you so that  you realize that you can fight whatever there is ahead of you with certain tools and support systems.  Trust me…April and I have been working together for this very moment for sometime now.  Having channeled information for the shift as well as the changes that will take place during this time.

I cannot stress enough to you that you MUST reach out to those around you now in this time.  Community is essential and the caregivers are ready to receive you.  I am working hard at being MYSELF these days, or I WILL be lost into that abyss.  I know now, the games have begun.

With this program today, I listened and at first I could not relax as my muscles (from my physical challenge) were spasming badly this morning.  I was just about to think….I will have to start this listening session over again and the next thing I know…bam!  I was on my way to the programing session….spoken in my own words, with April’s voice I was comfortably lulled into positive expression of self.  I felt the words stop but I was completely relaxed, and in the in between state of wake and sleep.  I listened to the silence that was after my program and felt at peace.  No worry, no fear.  Restful and pleasantly sleepy.  I napped afterward and had vivid dreams.  It was the best rest that I have gotten in the last month or more.  When I got up, I felt GOOD!  Better than good, great…I walked my dogs and took them on a long walk….feeling the weather and enjoying it.  I then came back and wrote this.

I am excited for the rest of this day, for this turning point for myself, and I encourage all of you….gather your tools, your friends, your community, and prepare yourself for your own emergence.

The butterfly escapes!

Wash away…

I really can’t say that I am surprised to be going through a roller coaster of thought v. heart.  One day a miracle of sorts will be presented to me, the next day it’s as if I dreamed it…only there were witnesses, so no chance of denial.  Some of the things I have received through channel and experience don’t always make sense to me…especially when they become deeply personal.  Part of me feels as if I am in shock.  The other part of me is completely oblivious to the “thoughts” coming from the first part….it has complete faith and zero fear.

What is so confusing to me is that I keep saying that I AM NOT RELIGIOUS, but if I quoted the words I receive, anyone would say I was speaking to religion.  I’m not.  I speak to the experiences I am having.  I really know that this is what is happening.  I am experiencing this for whatever reason.  We are never shown too far ahead, but faith is completely expected.  The little doubt that I have is not about the Universe or what I SHOULD be doing, but in myself.  The last shred of confusion remains…..

I know it is my job to get through those last reservations and embrace my destiny completely.  I often wonder how exactly I will do this, because all I feel I should be doing is taking a nap.  That is not myself choosing sleepiness, I recognize this feeling well.  This is the imposed sleep.  The rest that you shall take.  Regardless of whether or not I like it.  Its like watching the metronome….back and forth…back and forth….are you feeling sleepy?  Count from 10….10….9…8…zzzzzz!  I’m even planning on taking a vacation in the middle of feeling….OMF!!  What do I do?  What am I supposed to do?  Will this work if I DON’T do something????

That’s my brain…the mouse running around the maze desperately seeking the way.  My heart says: nap!

There are only so many times I can consciously feel this way and not realize that my fighting any of this just makes it more confusing.  I tell my clients to trust their heart because it will not lead them down the wrong path.  My heart says:  nap!  Rest!  Be gentle on yourself…..RELAX!!!!!

Take a few deep breaths and quiet yourself.  RELAX!  Just wait.  That is all that is required.  Just wait.  Close your eyes and experience the relief of being still.  Maybe you are tired, maybe you have been doing too much.  Perhaps its time for a siesta?  Por favor?

MMMMMMmmmmm….sounds good.  RELAX!!

When you wake up, you will feel so much better for having taken care of yourself, and your board will be swept clean.  A new start, a new day….full of promise….one you can create for yourself.  It’s not that far away.  Some of us cannot even fathom it, but the only thing to really do is let it wash over you.  Let it come.  Don’t fear it, allow it.  Don’t resist it…rejoice in it…this time it really is time.  This time allow yourself to be washed away by the waves gentle caress…wash away all fear from your mind…relax, surrender, let go!  Release control over your own destiny and all will fall into place.  We try to control so much.  I want to be quiet in my mind, serene, secure in my heart, in myself…..knowing or not knowing does not matter.

What will happen….what will happen??  Nothing and Everything.  RELAX!

Let it all be washed away.